Cheaters Never Win

Last night my good friend from the burbs spent the night at my place in the city. Its a monthly ritual of sorts; work out, order dinner, wine, and stay up late talking for hours. Not all of our nights in have been that routine of course. One night the wine flowed a little too much and we were cat walking in my kitchen at 1a.m. to Kelly Clarkson. Safe space. Don't tell.

Last night we talked about dating, sex, love (and ironically discussed which order those should come in). We got on the topic of cheating and what would be considered cheating. After my long term relationship I have a zero tolerance policy. I just can't let it go. She felt similarly.

What was interesting is how the concept and outlets for cheating have changed. With text messaging, Facebook,, tweeting and more, there are so many more opportunities and gray areas. I read online about sex messaging. People that have encounters via text. Well make sure that person is in your fave 5 and don't use up all your anytime minutes.

If your boyfriend (or girlfriend) flirted via text or online would you consider it cheating? Where do you draw the line in the sand? At the end of our discussion (and the bottom of our wine) we mutually agreed on the following:

Cheating is anything that you would not feel comfortable doing or saying in front of your spouse. It's sort of like that Aerosmith video-style dress that you wore back in the 80s with your big bangs? Just say no.

A back rub? Long lingering hug? Calling an "old friend"? If your partner was there would you still do it?

Think about your decisions and how they will impact other people. This is true in life - and not just in love.